"The Army Airborne major was used to harassment..." joke

The Army Airborne major was used to harassment from AirForce fliers about crazy Army paratroopers jumping out of perfectly good aircraft. "Obviously the Air Force knows there'sno such thing as a 'perfectly good aircraft,'" the irritated officer finally countered one afternoon, "because they pay you bastards four times as much to stay in one as the Armypays its men to jump.""You've got it all wrong, Major," an Air Force sergeant replied. "The Army figures anyone stupid enough to jump out of an airplane voluntarily is gonna be too dumb to bitchabout the salary."

The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian War Party.

The Indian Chief proclaims,

"So, YOU are the great Lone Ranger... In honor of the Harvest Festival, YOU will be executed in three days."

"Before I kill you, I more...

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While attending US Army's Airborne School...
Day before our first jump, the instructors (known as SGT Airbornes,
students are called 'Ariborne') demonstrated all the possible
malfunctions one might encounter. After watching a total malfunction,
i.e. the parachute more...

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Scientists at NASA built a gun specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airplanes, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of more...

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After enlisting in the 82nd Airborne Division, I eagerly asked my Recruiter what I could expect from jump school.
"Well," he said, "it's three weeks long."
"What else," I asked.
"The first week they separate the men from the more...

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