"Power of the Press" joke
A preacher wanted to raise money for his church,
and being told there was a fortune in horse
racing, he decided to purchase a horse and enter
it in the races. However, at the local auction,
the going price for horses was so high that the
preacher settled on a donkey instead. The preacher
figured, since he bought the animal, he might as
well race it. To his great surprise, the donkey
did quite well and came in third place. The next
day, the racing sheets carried this headline: Preacher Shows AssThe preacher was so pleased with the donkey that
he entered it in the races again, and this time
the animal won first place. The paper said: Preacher's Ass Out In FrontThe Bishop was so upset with this kind of
publicity that he ordered the preacher not to
enter the donkey in any more races. The newspaper
printed this headline: Bishop Scratches Preacher's AssThis was too much for the Bishop and he ordered
the preacher to get rid of the donkey. The
preacher decided to give the animal to a nun in a
local convent. The next day, the headlines read: Nun Has Best Ass In TownThe Bishop fainted. When he came around, he
informed the nun that she would have to dispose of
the donkey. The nun searched, finally finding a
farmer willing to buy the animal for ten dollars.
The paper stated: Nun Peddles Ass for Ten Bucks! They buried the Bishop the next day.
2 Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift.
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20, more...
Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan make your garden grow better! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan disorderly again! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan buscuits in more...
Dear Mom and Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us all to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried. We are OK. Only one of our tents and two of our sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily none us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for more...
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.