"One day while on patrol, a police..." joke

One day while on patrol, a police officer pulled over a car for speeding.
He
went up to the car and asked the driver to roll down her window. The first
thing he noticed, besides the nice red sports car, was how hot the driver
was! Blue eyes, blonde, the works.
"I've pulled you over for speeding, Ma'am. Could I see your drivers
license?" "What's a license???" replied the blonde, instantly giving away
the fact that she was as dumb as a stump.
"It's usually in your wallet," replied the officer. After fumbling for a few
minutes, the driver managed to find it. "Now may I see yourregistration?"
asked the cop.
"Registration... what's that....?" asked the blonde.
"It's usually in your glove compartment." said the cop impatiently.
After some more fumbling, she found the registration.
"I'll be back in a minute." said the cop and walked back to his car. The
officer phoned into the dispatch to run a check on the woman's license and
registration. After a few moments, the dispatcher came back, "Ummm... is
this woman driving a red sports car?"
"Yes." replied the officer
"Is she a drop dead gorgeous blonde?" asked the dispatcher "Uh... yes."
replied the cop.
"Here's what you do." said the dispatcher. "Give her the stuff back, and
drop your pants."
"What!!? I can't do that. Its... inappropriate." exclaimed the cop.
"Trust me. Just do it." said the dispatcher.
So the cop goes back to the car, gives back the license and registration and
drops his pants, just as the dispatcher said.
The blonde looks down and sighs...
"Ohh no... not another breathalyzer... "

It seems that a man was brought to criminal cort for the murder of his
wife.
Judge: "Sir, you have been brought before me and stand accussed of killing
your wife." "What do you have to say in your defense?"
Man: "Well your Honor, I came more...

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I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months, I don't like to interrupt her.

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Q: What did the pig say at the beach on a hot summer's day?
A: I'm bacon!

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A man walks into a bar and orders three beers. He takes a drink out of one... sets it down. Takes a drink out of the second... sets it down. Takes a drink out of the third one... sets it down. - and repeats this process until all three beers are gone. The man leaves. On the same more...

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A blonde and a brunette were watching the 11:00 news. The current news story
was about a man up on a ledge and threatening to jump. The station cuts to a
commercial.
Brunette: I bet you $20 he's going to jump.
Blonde: OK.
(back to newscast)
He more...

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