"Indian with no experience" joke
One evening, an Indian walked into the old western town near the out skirts of his village.
When he got to main street he headed straight for the whorehouse. When he got to the whorehouse he walked up to a woman there and he held out a small bag of gold and said, "me have money, me want woman."
She looked him up and down and said, "Boy, you need to know how to make love to a woman, before getting with one of my girls. Come back when you have some experience." The Indian left and walked out of the town back to his village.
The following day he went out to the woods and found a tree with a knothole in it, and had his way with the tree, and proceeded on with other trees late into the evening.
The following evening, the Indian walked back into town with his sack of gold in one hand and a 2x4 piece of wood in the other. When he stepped inside the whorehouse, the same older woman greeted him...
He then held out his bag of gold and proclaimed, "Me have money, me want woman, me have experience."
She then said, "Well then boy, I guess I can send you upstairs with one of my ladies now."
Right then a very beautiful woman walked around the corner, took him by the hand and walked him upstairs to a room.
Once they were there, they both proceeded to take of each other's clothes. As soon as the two of them were completely naked, the Indian then told the woman to turn around and bend over.
She looked at him puzzled and then bent over as the Indian requested
Then the Indian WHAKED her on the ass with the 2x4.
She screamed and jumped up and demanded. "What the hell was that for?"
The Indian stated " I was checking for bees!"
A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...
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Maori falla " Me miss!?"
English Teacher, "You! yes you?" "How many seconds are there in one minute?" Whole class puts their hands up. Miss! Miss! I know!
Maori falla " rrrrrrrr ummmmmmm rrr "60 Miss! 60 seconds in one minute more...