"Going Fishing" joke
A man phoned his wife from the office, "Honey, I have the chance to go fishing for a week. It's the opportunity of a lifetime, but I have to leave right away. Pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and especially my blue silk pajamas. I'll be home soon to pick them up."
He rushed home to pick up his things, hugged his wife, apologized for giving her such short notice and hurried off.
When he returned a week later, his wife asked, "Well, dear, did you have a good fishing trip?"
"I sure did," he replied. "The fishing was great, but you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas."
"No, dear, I didn't," the wife replied with a sly smile. "I put them in your tackle box!"
A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...
A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive more...
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!