"A little corporate humor" joke

A little corporate humor
I took some friends out to dinner last week, and I noticed a spoon in the shirt pocket of our waiter as he handed us the menus. It seemed a little odd, but I dismissed it as a random thing. Until our busboy came with water & tableware; he too, sported a spoon in his breast pocket. I looked around the room, and all the waiters, waitresses, busboys, etc. had spoons in their pockets.When our waiter returned to take our order, I just had to ask, "Why the spoons?""Well," he explained, "our parent company recently hired some AndersenConsulting efficiency experts to review all our procedures, and aftermonths of statistical analyses, they concluded that our patrons dropspoons on the floor 73% more often than any other utensil; at a frequency of 3 spoons per hour per workstation. By preparing all our workers for this contingency in advance, we can cut our trips to the kitchen down and save time...nearly 1.5 extra man-hours per shift. Just as he concluded, a "ch-ching" came from the table behind him, and he quickly replaced a fallen spoon with the one from his pocket."I'll grab another spoon the next time I'm in the kitchen instead ofmaking a special trip," he proudly explained.I was impressed. "Thanks. I had to ask.""No problem," he answered, then he continued to take our orders.As the members of my dinner party took their turns, my eyes dartedback & forth from each person ordering and my menu. That's when, out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a thin, black thread protruding from our waiter's fly. Again, I dismissed it; yet I had to scan the room and, sure enough, there were other waiters & busboys with strings hanging out of their trousers.My curiosity overrode discretion at this point, so before he could leave I had to ask. "Excuse me, but...uh...why, or what...about that string?""Oh, yeah" he began in a quieter tone. "Not many people are that observant. That same efficiency group found we could save time in the Men's room, too." "How's that, I asked?""You see, by tying a string to the end of our, eh..., selves, we canpull it out at the urinals literally hands-free and thereby eliminatethe need to wash our hands, cutting time spent in the restroom by over93%!" "Oh, that makes sense," I said, but then thinking through theprocess, I asked, "Hey, wait a minute. If the string helps you pull it out, how do you get it back in?""Well," he whispered, "I don't know about the other guys; but I usethe spoon in my pocket"!

I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and more...

154
28

This is about a guy who revealed himself as the biggest stupidass on a major international game site. His nickname was PolleZZ. At some point some other players took the nickname Webmaster and sent him a message, saying that there was a system update going on and that in order more...

6
2

Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

199
80

There were 10 blondes and 1 brunette hanging on a rope in the mountains. the rope was very weak and the brunette said someone had to let go. no one volunteered, until the brunette finally said she would let go, and gave a heart-felt speech. hearing this the blondes started more...

165
51

A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...

399
116
Be first to comment!
remember me
follow replies
Funny Joke? 5 vote(s). 80% are positive. 0 comment(s).