"A duck walks into a general store..." joke

A duck walks into a general store and asks the manager:
- "Got any fresh fruit?"
- "No."
- "Got any fresh vegetables?"
- "No. We have only canned and dry goods."
The next day, the duck returns:
- "Got any fresh fruit?"
- "No."
- "Got any fresh vegetables?"
- "No. I told you yesterday, we have only canned and dry goods. If you come back tomorrow and ask me the same question, I'll nail your flippers to the floor."
On the 3rd day, the duck walks in and asks:
- "Got any nails?"
- "No."
- "Got any fresh fruit?"

Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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The United Nations conducted a worldwide survey with one single question:

"Would you please give your opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"

The survey was a huge failure:

* In Latin America, they didn't more...

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We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control.

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Q: Why are women so bad at mathematics?
A: Because men keep telling them that this...

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... is 12 inches.

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A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit more...

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Penis:Penis
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SuzieDsouza:Dry Humor example: KEYHOLE TV: A man didn't have a TV set. So he drilled a hole through the wall into his neighbour's flat and watched the wrestling matches every night. Then he learnt that the neighbour didn't have a TV either. http://www.whatisguide.net/0102-dry-humor.html
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Shariq:Hillarious..Hahahahaha.....
Funny Joke? 49 vote(s). 71% are positive. 3 comment(s).