"A diplomat is a person who thinks" joke

A diplomat is a person who thinks twice before he says nothing.

You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!

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Ya mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.

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A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...

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This is an actual essay written by a college applicant, when applying to NYU where he now attends.
3A. ESSAY IN ORDER FOR THE ADMISSIONS STAFF OF OUR COLLEGE TO GET TO KNOW YOU, THE APPLICANT, BETTER, WE ASK THAT YOU ANSWER THE FOLLOWING QUESTION:
ARE THERE ANY more...

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Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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