"A Blonde's Diary" joke

MONDAY: It's so much fun to cook for Ron. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. Fortunately, the neighbors were kind enough to loan me some extra bowls.
TUESDAY: Ron wanted fruit salad for dinner. The recipe said serve without dressing so, I didn't dress. What a surprise when Ron brought his boss home for dinner.
WEDNESDAY: A great day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed sort of silly, but I took a shower. I can't say it improved the rice any.
THURSDAY: Today, Ron asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Which is what led up to Ron asking me why I was rolling around in the garden.
FRIDAY: I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put all ingredients in a bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was exactly the same as when I left.
SATURDAY: Ron did the grocery shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday (Oh boy). For some strange reason, Ron keeps counting to ten.
SUNDAY: Ron's parents came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast, but all I could find was hamburger. Suddenly, I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. Much to my disappointment, it still came out hamburger.
GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY: This has been such an exciting week. I can hardly wait for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Ron. If only we could get a larger oven, I would love to surprise him with Chocolate Moose.

Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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A four-year-old boy asked his friend what a penis was. His friend's response was that he did not know and he would ask his dad.

That evening the second boy asked his dad. His dad gladly exposed himself to his son and with his penis in hand said, "Son this is a more...

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A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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your momas so fat when she stepped on the scale it said new high score.

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