Whisper Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    I heard this from my uncle John Herbert. You can't offend anyone with it.
    A telephone sales person makes a call to an unknown prospect and
    a very small, very soft, very quiet, and obviously young person
    answers the phone.
    Sales person: Hello, may I speak to the man of the house please?
    Youngster: (whispering) No, he's busy.
    Sales person: Well then, can I please speak to your mother?
    Youngster: (in a whisper) She's busy too.
    Sales person: I see, how about your brother? Can I speak to him?
    Youngster: (whispering) No. He's busy too.
    Sales person: (losing patience) Is your sister there? Can I talk to her?
    Youngster: (in a whisper) She's busy too.
    Sales person: ( by now quite exasperated) What are all these people
    doing that keeps them so busy?!!!
    Youngster: (still whispering) Looking for me.

    A man selling carpet called a home and a little boy with a whisper answered the phone the man introduced himself to the child and asked if he could speak to his father the little boy said, "no" the man asked why not? The little boy exclaimed, " He`s busy" so the man asked to speak with his mother, the little boy said, "no" the man asked why not? The little boy said, "She's busy" so the man asked if there were any other grown ups in the house. The little boy said, " yes a policeman and a fireman" the man asked to speak to the policeman the little boy said, "no" He`s busy so the man asked to speak to the fireman and the little boy said, "no" He`s busy so the man puzzled said, there are four grownups in your house and they are all busy, do you mind if I ask what are they doing? The little boy still in a whisper says " yah they are looking for me"

    A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee."

    The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word' pee' in church. From now on when you have to' pee' just tell me that you have to whisper'."

    The following Sunday, the little boy went to church with his Father and during the service said to his father, "Daddy, I have to whisper."

    The Father looked at him and said, "Okay, why don't you whisper in my ear."

    The father was distressed by his thirteen-year-old son's preoccu­pation with breasts. The boy would repeatedly point to attractive girls and whisper: "Hey, Dad, look at the knockers on that one!"
    The father finally took the boy to a psychiatrist, who assured him that just one day's intensive therapy could cure the boy. When the session was over, father and son walked several blocks to a bus stop. The boy remained silent as they passed a number of pretty girls. As they boarded the bus, the father was inwardly complimenting the psychiatrist. Then his son tugged at his sleeve and whispered: "Hey, Dad, look at the ass on that bus driver!"

    Little Johnny and his mother were on a train. Johnny leant over and started to whisper in his mother's ear.' Johnny, how many times have I told you,' said his mother,' it's rude to whisper. If you have something to say, say it out loud.'' OK, said Johnny,' why does the lady over there look like an ugly, haggard old witch? '

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