True Story Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    When I was in the Air Force, they had a weekly paper.
    It had a lost and found section. One day I was reading it and saw this:
    "Found, one black boy's bicycle".
    Wonder how they knew?

    Texas: A man convicted of robbery worked out a deal to pay $9600 in damages rather than serve a prison sentence.
    For payment, he provided the court a check - a *forged* check. He got 10 years.

    When asked for her occupation, a woman charged with a traffic violation said she was a schoolteacher.
    The judge rose from the bench. "Madam, I have waited years for a schoolteacher to appear before this court," he smiled with delight.
    "Now sit down at that table and write 'I will not pass through a red light' five hundred times."

    When Apollo Mission Astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he
    not only gave his famous "One small step for man, one giant leap for man
    kind" statement but followed it by several remarks, usual com traffic
    between him, the other astronauts and Mission Control. Just before he
    reentered the lander, however, he made the enigmatic remark "Good luck Mr.
    Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival
    Soviet Cosmonaut. However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either
    the Russian or American Space Programs. Over the years many people
    questioned Mr. Armstrong as to what the "Good Luck Mr. Gorsky" statement
    meant, but Mr. Armstrong always just smiled and would not answer.
    Just last year, (On July 5, 1996) in Tampa, Florida while answering
    questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 29 year old
    question to Mr. Armstrong again. This time he finally more...

    Earlier this summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an
    hour east of Bakersfield, a fellow new to boating was having a problem. No
    matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't get his brand new 22-ft Bayliner
    to perform. It wouldn't get on a plane at all, and was very sluggish in
    almost every maneuver, no matter how much power he supplied.
    After about an hour of trying to make it go, he putted over to a nearby
    marina. Maybe they could tell him what was wrong.
    A thorough topside check revealed everything was in perfect working order.
    The engine ran fine, the outdrive went up and down, the prop was the
    correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to
    check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.
    Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

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