Singers Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: How do you tell when your lead singer is at the door? A: He can't find the key and doesn't know when to come in. Q: What is the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and an All-Pro offensive lineman? A: Stage makeup. Q: How many lead singers does it take to change a light bulb? A: One. He holds the bulb while the world revolves around him. Q: What is the difference between a soprano and a Porsche? A: Most musicians have never been inside a Porsche. Q: Did you hear about the female opera singer who had quite a range at the lower end of the scale. A: She was known as the deep C diva. Q: What is the missing link between the bass and the ape? A: The baritone. Q: What is the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and a Wagnerian Tenor? A: About 10 pounds. Q: How can you tell when a tenor is really stupid? A: When the other tenors notice. Ever hear the one about the tenor who was so off-key that even the other tenors could tell? Q: How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb? A: more...

How are opera singers and sailors alike?
They both have to handle the high seas(Cs)!

Q: How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two ” One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
Q: How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but it sure takes a whole lot of light bulbs!

Q: How many tenors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three - One to do it and two to stand there and tell each other how they could have done it better.

Q: How many female opera singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. If they sing loudly enough they'll break it.

Q: How many classical music singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None - "Impossible. The altitude may put unnecessary strain on my vocal chords. Have the bassist do it."

Q: How many conductors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Seven. (Indignant nose upturned.) Of course, I wouldn't expect you to understand.

Q: How many country & western singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love she is with the new one, and one to go "Yeeeee-Hah! " and throw his hat in the more...

Q: How do you tell when your lead singer is at the door?
A: He can`t find the key and doesn`t know when to come in.

Q: What is the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and an All-Pro offensive lineman?
A: Stage makeup.

Q: How many lead singers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. He holds the bulb while the world revolves around him.

Q: What is the difference between a soprano and a Porsche?
A: Most musicians have never been inside a Porsche.

Q: Did you hear about the female opera singer who had quite a range at the lower end of the scale.
A: She was known as the deep C diva.

Q: What is the missing link between the bass and the ape?
A: The baritone.

Q: What is the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and a Wagnerian Tenor?
A: About 10 pounds.

Q: How can you tell when a tenor is really stupid?
A: When the other tenors notice.

Ever hear the one more...