Short Jokes / Recent Jokes

Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because of the honey combs.

Memo from Director General to Manager:
Today at 11 o'clock there will be a total eclipse of the sun. This is when the sun disappears behind the moon for two minutes. As this is something that cannot be seen every day, time will be allowed for employees to view the eclipse in the car park. Staff should meet in the car park at ten to eleven, when I will deliver a short speech introducing the eclipse, and giving some background information. Safety goggles will be made available at a small cost.
Memo from Manager to Department Head:
Today at ten to eleven, all staff should meet in the car park. This will be followed by a total eclipse of the sun, which will disappear for two minutes. For a moderate cost, this will be made safe with goggles. The Director General will deliver a short speech beforehand to give us all some background information. This is not something that can be seen every day.
Memo from Department Head to Floor Manager:
The Director General will today more...

Why do the elephants have short tails? Because they cant remember long stories!

Yo momma so short she can hang glides Doritos!
Yo momma's like a "Happy Meal" small, cheap and greasy.
Yo momma is like a toilet; fat, white, and smells like shit.
Yo momma's so short, she can sit on a dime and swing her legs.
Yo momma so stupid, she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Yo momma's so short, she does back flips under the bed.

What do young ghosts write their homework in?
Exorcise books.

A Short History of MedicineI have an earache... 2000 B. C. - Here, eat this root. 1000 A. D. - That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer. 1850 A. D. - That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this potion. 1940 A. D. - That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill. 1985 A. D. - That pill is ineffective. Here, take this antibiotic. 2000 A. D. - That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root.

1. An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
2. A few beers short of a six-pack.
3. Dumber than a box of hair.
4. A few peas short of a casserole.
5. Doesn't have all his corn flakes in one bowl.
6. One fruit loop shy of a full bowl.
7. One taco short of a combination plate.
8. Cranially challenged.
9. All foam no beer.
10. The cheese slid off of his cracker.