Shoe Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man walks into a shoe store... and tries on a pair of shoes. "How do they feel?" asks the sales clerk. "Well... they feel a bit tight." replies the man. The assistant promptly bends down and has a look at the shoes and themans feet. "Try pulling the tongue out." offers the clerk. Nath theyth sthill feelth a bith tighth." He says.

Deciding to take up jogging, the middle-aged man was astounded by the wide selection of jogging shoes available at the local sports shoe store. While trying on a basic pair of jogging shoe, he noticed a minor feature and asked the clerk about it. "What's this little pocket thing here on the side for?" "Oh, that's to carry spare change so you can call your wife to come pick you up when you've jogged too far."

Gold`s Law: If the shoe fits, it`s ugly

Goldenstern`s Rules: 1. Always hire a rich attorney. 2. Never buy from a rich salesman.

Golden Rule Of Arts And Sciences: Whoever has the gold makes the rules.

Gordian Maxim: If a string has one end, it has another.

Gordon`s First Law: If a research project is not worth doing at all, it is not worth doing well.

Gordon`s Object Lifespan Theorem: No matter the amount of care given the purchased object, it will fuse/explode/disassemble within three days of warranty expiration.

Gordon`s Warranty Law: All warranty clauses expires upon bill payment.

Ya have to check in the bottom yer shoe for change so you can get grandma a new plug of tobacco.

Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.

Once there were two chinese gentlemen named Mr. Ho and Mr. Chen. They were neighbors but happened to be very competitive. One day Mr. Ho decided to start a shoe business, he named his store WE DO SHOE. now Mr. Chen decided he must compete with Mr. Ho, so he started a shoe business right next door to Mr. Ho's store and he named it SHOE DO WE.

Smaller or larger tuxedo
A friend got married and I, being the best man, decided a humorous practical joke was in order. One of the duties of the best man is to make arrangements for the pick up and return of the groom’s tuxedo.

After final fitting, rent an extra coat jacket that is either three or four sizes smaller or larger than the groom’s. Explain to the tux shop what you’re up to. Pick up the groom’s fitted coat, switch with the extra rented coat, and deliver to the groom only when it becomes time to actually get dressed.

The friend of mine wore a 42 long, but the one I provided was a 38 short. Talk about some serious fun! Don’t reveal that you know anything as long as possible.

Write on the bottom of shoes
Someone once took a large black ink marker and wrote “Help” on the bottom of the groom’s left shoe and “Me” on the bottom of the right shoe. So when he knelt down for his vows, the entire congregation saw it. Of more...