Rooster Jokes / Recent Jokes
Question: If a rooster laid an egg on the top of a barn, which way would it roll?
Answer: Neither, roosters don't lay eggs.Question: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Answer: Because the rooster egged her on.Question: Did you hear the one about the egg?
Answer: It's not all it's "cracked" up to be! Question: Why can't you tease egg whites?
Answer: They can't take a yolk.Knock, Knock!
Who's there?
Omelette.
Omelette who?
Omelette smarter than I look! Question: What do you call an egg that goes on safari?
Answer: An eggs-plorer!Question: What do you call a city of 20 million eggs?
Answer: New Yolk City! Question: What happens when you tell an egg a joke?
Answer: It cracks up! Question: What do you get when you put a Tasmanian Devil in a chicken coop?
Answer: Deviled eggs! Question: Why did the chicken lay an egg?
Answer: Because it would break if she dropped it! Question: Where did the chicken go on her more...
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."
Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says,
"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."
He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then... " he sighed..
"...let's put all these Corn Flakes back in the box."
Q. What do you get when you cross a rooster and peanut butter?
A. A cock that sticks to the roof of your mouth.
A Priest was in his room and realized that his rooster was missing. He decided to bring it up in Sunday Mass.
Right before the sermon the Priest asked, "Who has a cock?" All of the men inthe room stood up.
The Priest said, "No, No, No. Who has seen a
cock?" All of the women in the room stood up.
The Priest said, "No, No, No. Who has seen MY COCK?" All of the nuns stood up.
There was a farmer. He had alot of chickens but had no roosters.
So in order to get eggs he went and got a rooster. The man he got the rooster form told him that the rooster would screw everything in sight. But the farmer wanted the rooster anyway.
So he took it home and it screwed all the chickens. After a while it started screwing all the other farm animals.
So one day the farmer walked up to the rooster and said, ”Ya better stop screwing everything or you will screw yourself to death! ” But the rooster just kept on screwing.
One day the farmer was walking through the field, and he found the rooster laying on the ground with buzzards flying all around.
So he walked up to the rooster and said, ”I told you you’d screw yourself to death! ” then the rooster opened his eyes and said, - “SHUT-UP! I’m trying to get them to land! ”
An old farmer decided it was time to get a new rooster for his hens. The current rooster was still doing an okay job, but he was getting on in years and the farmer figured getting a new rooster couldn't hurt. So he buys a new cock from the local rooster emporium, and turns him loose in the barnyard. Well, the old rooster sees the young one strutting around and he's a little worried. So, they're trying to replace me, thinks the old rooster- I've got to do something about this! He walks up to the new bird and says,' So you're the new stud in town? I bet you really think you're hot stuff don't you? Well I'm not ready for the chopping block yet. I'll bet I'm still the better bird. And to prove it, I challenge you to a race around that hen house over there. We'll run around it ten times and whoever finishes first gets to have all the hens for himself.' Well, the young rooster was a proud sort, and he definately thought he was more than a match for the old guy.' You're on', he said,' and more...