Robbed Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two pigs robbed a bank. Why were they caught so quickly? They squealed on each other.

...heirheadess paris hilton's home was robbed of more than $2 million worth of jewelry...paris said "this time the robbers took even more than the last time i was robbed. Last time they took like eleventy thousand dollars worth."

Detroit, Oregon - A hunter thought he had found a severed human head in an abandoned mining shed and called the police. Deputy Larry Taylor realized it was just the head of a mannequin when he noticed a price sticker on the forehead.

Redondo Beach, California - After a short chase, officer Joseph Fonteno charged the driver of a white Mazda with DUI. The car had been driving down Pacific Coast Highway with the upper half of a traffic light pole laying across its hood. When Fonteno asked the drunk driver about the pole, he responded: "It came with the car when I bought it."

Australia - The Australian Police Journal reported that an elderly woman had already used about half of the powder in a custard packet when she discovered an object that appeared to be a large dead cockroach. However, when she brought it to the Health Department, food analysts determined it to be a dried-up human finger. The following investigation revealed that a factory worker had more...

Chicago -30-year-old Emad Haddad was shot and killed Friday afternoon
after chasing two men who'd robbed his store-Sunburst Food and Liquors-on
Chi-Town's bright and glamorous 79th Street.
According to cops, two gents toting semi-auto pistols robbed the store's
registers. Witnesses say Emad The Genius (as he will be remembered) ran
after the men with a two-shot derringer and took a shot at 'em.
They returned the favor with a hail of bullets.
Haddad was struck in the head and died on the spot.

A farmer and his daughter were coming back from town with their money from some sales and a large sack of flour when all of a sudden these highway men held them up and robbed them of everything.
A few minutes later the farmer exclaims, "We're ruined, all the money's gone and there's no flour for bread!"
His daughter says, "No, papa, I hid the money in my you-know-what."
The farmer said, "You're a good girl, but if your mamma was here -
she could have saved the sack of flour as well!"

A farmer and his daughter were coming back from town with their money from some sales and a large sack of flour when all of a sudden these highway men held them up and robbed them of everything. A few minutes later the farmer exclaims, "We're ruined, all the money's gone and there's no flour for bread!" His daughter says, "No, papa, I hid the money in my you-know-what." The farmer said, "You're a good girl, but if your mamma was here - she could have saved the sack of flour as well!"