Nod Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two guys are on duty at a french foreign legion fort. One says to the other one, "See that camel over there? I'll bet you I can make him jump 30 feet in the air. The other guy says "No way". The first guy walks around to the back of the camel with two bricks, reaches in between the camel's legs and crashes the bricks together. The camel jumps 30 feet in the air. A couple of days later the first guy says to the second guy, "I bet you I can make that camel nod his head yes, then shake his head no." The second guy says, "You got me last time, but there's no way you can make that dumb animal nod his head yes then shake it no." The first guy takes the same two bricks, walks around to the front of the camel, holds up the bricks and says, "Remember what I did last time?". (Camel nods). "Want me to do it again?"

A newlywed farmer and his wife were visited by her mother, who immediately
demanded an inspection of the place. The Farmer had genuinely tried to be
friendly to his new mother-in-law, hoping that it could be a friendly,
non-antagonistic relationship. To no avail, she kept nagging them at every
opportunity, demanding changes, offering unwanted advice and making life
unbearable to the farmer and his new bride. While they were walking through
the barn, the farmer's mule suddenly reared up and kicked the mother-in-law
in the head, killing her instantly. At the funeral service a few days
later, the farmer stood near the casket and greeted folks as they walked
by. The pastor noticed that whenever a woman would whisper something to the
farmer, he would nod his head yes and say something. Whenever a man walked
by and whispered to the farmer, however, he would shake his head, no and
mumble a reply. Very curious as more...

A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence. He's allowed to say only two words every 7 years. After the first 7 years, the elders bring him in and ask him for his 2 words." Cold floors," he says. They nod and send him away. 7 more years pass and they bring him in for his 2 words. He clears his throat and says, "Bad food." They nod and send him away. 7 more years pass and they bring him in for his 2 words. "I quit," he says." That's not surprising," the elders say... "You've done nothing but complain since you've been here!"