Media Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: When does Micheal Jackson go to bed?
A: When the big hands touch the little hands.

I went to town to buy my own christmas present today,- "what you buy"- I baught a palestinian sex doll.
When i got on the bus to come home the fucker blew its self up.

Q: Have you heard about Michael Jackson's New Book?
A: It's called, "The In's and Out's of Child Rearing".
Q: What do Michael Jackson and the Baltimore Orioles have in common?
A: They both walk around with one glove on their hand for no apparent reason.
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding have decided to begin training racehorses together? Yup, she's gonna do all the handicapping and he's gonna ride all the 3-year-olds!
Q: Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men??
A: He thought it was a delivery service.
The Pope has issued a proclamation on Michael Jackson. If he hears any more allegations about little boys, the Pope says he'll have no choice but to make him a priest!
Q: How can you tell when Michael Jackson is giving a party?
A: By all the Big Wheels parked in his driveway.
And finally, I found out why Michael has cut down on public appearances... He wants to spend more time with the kids!

10. "Get in there you big furry oaf, I don't care what you smell!"
9. "Luke, at that speed do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?"
8. "Put that thing away before you get us all killed."
7. "You've got something jammed in here real good."
6. "Aren't you a little short for a storm trooper?"
5. "You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought."
4. "Sorry about the mess..."
3. "Look at the size of that thing!"
2. "Curse my metal body, I wasn't fast enough!"
1. "She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid."

Pfizer Corp (NYSE PFE) is making the announcement today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola Bottling Group (NYSE PBG) as a power beverage, suitable for use as-is, or a mixer, under the name "Mount and Do."
Pepsi's proposed ad campaign suggests:
"It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one."

A writer dies and reaches the Golden Gates where God gives him a choice to either go to Heaven or Hell. He finds it difficult to make up his mind so he asks God if he can have a little tour of both places.
God agrees and they first go to Hell where the writer sees rows and rows of writers, chained to their desks in an overheated room, being whipped if they stopped writing for a second by merciless editors and publishers. This really frightens the writer who then proceeds to Heaven hoping it'll be better.
In Heaven too he sees rows of writers, chained to their desks in an over heated room, being whipped mercilessly.
So he turns to God and says, "But they're both the same!" To which God replies, "Oh no. Here in Heaven your work gets published!"

wat do micdonalds and micheal jackson hav in commmon, they both stick there 46 year old meat into 6 year old buns.