Masked Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween party. Unfortunately, the wife had a horrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. Being the devoted husband, he protested, but she argued that there was no need for his good time to be spoiled just because she wasn't going. She was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and urged him to go to the party and enjoy himself.
    After taking some aspirin and sleeping for an hour or so, the wife awakened without any pain and as it was still early, decided to go to the party.
    Since her husband had no idea what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching him to see how he acted when she wasn't with him.
    She joined the party and quickly spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every chick he could, copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. She casually sidled up to him and being a seductive woman herself, he left his partner high and dry and turned his more...

    A cargo plane is in mid-flight over the ocean when suddenly the cockpit door bursts open to reveal an armed, masked hijacker to a startled pilot, copilot, navigator, and a passenger. The passenger happens to be George W Bush. (Why?} Maybe, he was on his way to check on the coca plant life in South America!") The masked gunman held a gun to the pilot's head and said, "Take this plane to Iraq or I'm gonna spill your brains all over the place." The pilot calmly reached up, pushed the gun aside and said, "Look buddy, if you shoot me this plane will crash right into the sea and you'll die along with the rest of us." The hijacker thought about it, then held the gun to the copilot's head and said, "Take this plane to Iraq or I'm gonna spill HIS brains all over the place." The copilot also calmly reached up, pushed the gun aside and said, "Listen to me. The pilot's got a bad heart and he could keel over at the shock of my being killed. So if you shoot more...

    My daughter Louise says: (nwod esion taht nruT) If the religious fundies
    are so worried about (trohs oot si triks tahT) Satanic backward masked
    messages being inserted into pop records, why (moor ruoy ydiT) don't
    they make up their own books, pop records, television programmes
    (kcolc'o net erofeb ereh kcab eB) and Usenet jokes and put their own
    backward (dehsinif krowemoh ruoy teG) masked messages into them?

    A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain; and, as it was still early, decided to go to the party after all. In as much as her husband didn't know what costume she'd be wearing, she thought she'd have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she wasn't around.
    She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every chick he could, getting a little kiss here and a warm squeeze there. His wife went up to him and being rather seductive herself, he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to this new babe who had just more...

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