Lovin Jokes

A young farmer couple got married, and they just couldn't seem to get enough
lovin'. Just before leaving the house for the fields at dawn, they made love,
and when the husband returned home at evening they had another go - both before
and after supper, and then again a few more times during the night.
The problems only happened during the day. The fields were far away from the
house and the young man lost half an hour each time traveling home and back
again at noon. Finally he decided to consult a friend, the town's doctor, about
what to do.
"Easiest thing in the world, Homer" said the doctor. "You take your rifle out
with you every day, don't you? Well, when you feel like you're in the mood for
some lovin', just fire a shot into the air as a signal to your wife, for her to
come out to you. That way you won't lose any workin' time."
Homer tried his friend's solution and it seemed to work pretty well for a more...

Q: What do a redneck divorce and a tornado have in common?
A: Either way somebody loses a trailer home!
You know you're a redneck if your wife wants to take a bath but you have to move the transmision from the tub first.
You know you're a red neck when you go to family reunions to pick up chicks!
If you've been married three times and your in-laws aint changed then you might just be a redneck.
If a sign reads say no to crack and you pull up your pants then you might just be a redneck.
You know you are redneck when you mow your lawn and find a car.
You know you are redneck when your favorite shirt is illegal in more then 15 states.
You know you are redneck when you shut your car door and your gun makes you a sun-roof.
You know you are redneck when your friends go water skiing while you are towing your boat to the lake.
You might be a redneck if your exhaust system incorporates more than three wire hangers and at least two juice cans.
You more...

Q: What do a redneck divorce and a tornado have in common? A: Either way somebody loses a trailer home! You know you're a redneck if your wife wants to take a bath but you have to move the transmision from the tub first.You know you're a red neck when you go to family reunions to pick up chicks! If you've been married three times and your in-laws aint changed then you might just be a redneck.If a sign reads say no to crack and you pull up your pants then you might just be a redneck.You know you are redneck when you mow your lawn and find a car.You know you are redneck when your favorite shirt is illegal in more then 15 states.You know you are redneck when you shut your car door and your gun makes you a sun-roof.You know you are redneck when your friends go water skiing while you are towing your boat to the lake.You might be a redneck if your exhaust system incorporates more than three wire hangers and at least two juice cans.You might be a redneck if you think "fat-free" more...

A young farmer couple got married, and they just couldn't seem to get enough lovin'. Just before leaving the house for the fields at dawn, they made love, and when the husband returned home at evening they had another go - both before and after supper, and then again a few more times during the night.
The problems only happened during the day. The fields were far away from the house and the young man lost half an hour each time traveling home and back again at noon. Finally he decided to consult a friend, the town's doctor, about what to do.
"Easiest thing in the world, Homer" said the doctor. "You take your rifle out with you every day don't you? Well, when you feel like you're in the mood for some lovin', just fire a shot into the air as a signal to your wife, for her to come out to you. That way you won't lose any workin' time."
Homer tried his friend's solution and it seemed to work pretty well for a while. One day though, the doctor stopped by the more...