Fields Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    "Who in their right mind would ever need more than 640k of ram!?" -- Bill Gates, 1981 "Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons." -- Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949 "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers." -- Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943 "I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won't last out the year." -- The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957 "But what. .. is it good for?" -- Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip. "There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home." -- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977 "This' telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The more...

    Along time ago when no one know about mirror. A person loves his father very much, his father was about 75 years old. His father was a farmer. One day his father was seriously ill and passed away.

    After 25 years later when he was about 74 years, one day he was digging the field he got a mirror from there as no one was aware of mirror he thought that it is a pic of his father because he havent seen his own face. He took that pic in his cupboard he always before going 2 fields or after coming from the fields kiss that pic. Once her wife thought that y he open the cupboard everyday becaz it hadnt happend before. When his husband went out she opened that cupboard she saw a pic(mirror) achhaaaaa! now i understand y he looks in cupboard, oh this is the churail which he looks at everyday(as she was looking her self in the mirror ).

    Feeling footloose, fancy-free and frisky, this feather-brained fellow finagled his fond father into forking over his fortune. Forthwith, he fled for foreign fields and frittered his farthings feasting fabulously with fair-weather friends. Finally, fleeced by those folly filled fellows and facing famine, he found himself a feed flinger in a filthy farm-lot. He fain would have filled his frame with foraged food from fodder fragments.
    "Fooey! My father's flunkies fare far fancier," the frazzled fugitive fumed feverishly, frankly facing fact.
    Frustrated from failure and filled with forebodings, he fled for his family. Falling at his father's feet, he floundered forlornly. "Father, I have flunked and fruitlessly forfeited further family favors..."
    But the faithful father, forestalling further flinching, frantically flagged his flunkies to fetch forth the finest fatling and fix a feast.
    But the fugitive's fault finding frater, faithfully farming his more...

    A farmer from the wheat fields of Washington state dies and goes to Hell. While down there the Devil notices that the farmer is
    not suffering like the rest. He checks the gauge and sees that it's 95 degrees and about 80% humidity. So he goes over to the
    farmer and ask why he's so happy. The farmer says, "The temperature is just like plowing my fields in June."
    The devil isn't happy with the farmer's answer and decides to "get" him, so he goes over to his controls and turns up the
    temperature to 105 degrees and the humidity to 90%. Afterwards he goes looking for the farmer. . . He finds him standing
    around just as happy as can be. The Devil asks the farmer, again, why he's so happy. The farmer replies, "This is even better,
    it's like pulling weeds in the fields during July."
    The Devil, now upset, decides to really make the farmer suffer. He goes over to the controls and turns the heat up to 115
    degrees and the more...

    The following is an exact transcription of a letter John Mongan received from MIT, and the reply that he sent them. Unfortunately, they chose to discontinue their correspondence at that point. I have heard, however, that their recruitment letter has been revised and is far less snotty than it once was.
    April 18, 1994
    Mr. John T. Mongan 123 Main Street Smalltown, California 9;;;;,-;;;;,
    Dear John:
    You've got the grades. You've certainly got the PSAT scores. And now you've got a letter from MIT. Maybe you're surprised. Most students would be.
    But you're not most students. And that's exactly why I urge you to consider carefully one of the most selective universities in America.
    The level of potential reflected in your performance is a powerful indicator that you might well be an excellent candidate for MIT. It certainly got my attention!
    Engineering's not for you? No problem. It may surprise you to learn we offer more than 40 major fields of study, from more...

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