Lodger Jokes

The eighty year old man had gone to see his doctor for pre-marriage tests.
"I'm marrying a twenty year old", he said.
"Why are you doing that?", asked the doctor.
"I want a son and heir. Can you give me any advice?"
"Yes, get a lodger", said the doctor, smirking. A few months later, the old fellow returned to the doctor.
"Is your wife pregnant yet?", queried the doctor.
"Yes".
"So you did take in a lodger?"
"Oh yes", replied the old man, "and she's pregnant too!"

Doris and Fred had started their retirement years and decided to raise some extra cash by advertising for a lodger in their terrace house.
After a few days, a young attractive woman applied for the room and explained that she was a model working in a near-by city center studio for a few weeks and that she would like the room from Mondays to Thursdays, but would pay for the whole week. Doris showed her the house and they agreed to start straight away.
"There's just one problem," explained the model. "Because of my job, I have to have a bath every night, and I notice you don't have a bath."
"That's not a problem," replied Doris. "We have a tin bath out in the yard and we bring it into the living room in front of the fire and fill it with hot water."
"What about your husband? asked the model. "Oh, he plays darts most weekdays, so he will be out in the evenings," replied Doris.
"Good," said the more...