Lie Jokes / Recent Jokes

He met her on a party. She was so outstanding, many guys chasing after her, while he was so normal, nobody paid attention to him. At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was surprised, but due to being polite, she promised. They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt uncomfortable, she thought, please, let me go home.. Suddenly he asked the waiter:

"Would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee."

Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red, but, still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it.

She asked him curiously: why you have this hobby?

He replied: "when I was a little boy, I was living near the sea, I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I more...

(100 ways to keep your Testosterone flowing)
1 Don't call, ever.
2 If you don't like a girl, don't tell her. It's more fun to let her figure it out by herself.
3 Lie.
4 Name your penis. Be sure it is something narcissistic and unoriginal, such as "spike"
5 If you lose something that belongs to someone else, tell them you mailed it to them.
6 Here's a good pick-up line, "My girlfriend's pregnant, will you go out with me?
7 Drink Vernors.
8 Play with yourself. Talk about it.
9 Be as ambiguous as possible. If you don't want to answer, a nice grunt will do.
10 Always remember: You are a man. Therefore, no matter what, it isn't your fault.
11 Lie
12 Girls find it attractive if a man has had more women than baths.
13 Never ask for help. Even if you really, really need help don't ask. People will think you have no penis.
14 Women like it when you ignore them. It arouses them.
15 Vanity is the most more...

1) NOT KISSING FIRST.

Avoiding her lips and diving straight for the erogenous zones makes her feel like you're paying by the hour and trying to get your money's worth by cutting out nonessentials. A properly passionate kiss is the ultimate form of foreplay.

2) BLOWING TOO HARD IN HER EAR.

Admit it, some kid at school told you girls love this. Well, there's a difference between being erotic and blowing as if you're trying to extinguish the candles on your 50th birthday cake. That hurts.

3) NOT SHAVING.

You often forget you have a porcupine strapped to your chin which you rake repeatedly across your partner's face and thighs. When she turns her head from side to side, it's not passion, it's avoidance.

4) SQUEEZING HER BREAST.

Most men act like a housewife testing a melon for ripeness when they get their hand on a pair. Stroke, caress, and soothe them.

5) BITING HER NIPPLES.

Why do men more...