Laude Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    (n) The notation generally following your name in a class record.
    Admissions Office
    (n) Where they take you to get you to admit you've
    mooned the keynote speaker during "new student weekend."
    (n) One of those classes that sounds vaguely risque until
    you find out what it REALLY involves.
    (n) A class located suspiciously near the cafeteria.
    (n) A depository of knowledge which a student will try to stay
    awake long enough to read the night before finals.
    (n) A large container in which students store candy bars, gum,
    combs, little slips of paper with phone numbers on them, yo-yos,
    sunglasses, student I.D.s, loose change, magazines, & (occasionally) books.
    (n) from Latin "cafe" ("place to eat") and "teria" ("to wretch").
    (n) One of the four basic food groups.
    (v) What you can't do because your more...

    A survey of personnel executives at large companies provided the following unbelievable but supposedly true examples of job applicant behavior.
    "The reason the candidate was taking so long to respond to a question became apparent when he began to snore."
    "When I asked the candidate to give a good example of the organizational skills she was boasting about, she said she was proud of her ability to pack her suitcase' real neat' for her vacations."
    "Why did (the applicant) go to college?" His reply: "To party and socialize."
    "When I gave him my business card at the beginning of the interview, he immediately crumpled it and tossed it in the wastebasket."
    "I received a resume and letter that said that the recent high-school graduate wanted to earn $25 an hour-'and not a nickel less.'"
    "(The applicant) had arranged for a pizza to be delivered to my office during a lunch-hour interview. I asked him more...

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