Graduate Jokes / Recent Jokes
A graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
A graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
A graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
A graduate with a Law degree asks, "Who gave it a permission to work?"
A graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Would you like fries with that?"
After a long while, a graduate of Religious Studies got a job with a Charitable Organization, and was given an incentive to own a cell phone.
The very day he got the phone, a robber who asked, "your handset or your life", accosted him, he responded and said, "my life"!
A few fraternity brothers needed to fill a science requirement in order to graduate, so they spent weeks studying for the final. The day of the exam arrived and they were more than ready for the test. The teacher pulled out a chart, and on it were different pictures of bird's legs. The teacher said, "This is your exam. Name these birds by their legs." After ten minutes one boy stood up, absolutely furious, and slammed the paper down on the teachers desk. "Dammit!" he hollered. "You knew I needed to pass this exam to graduate. How could you do this to me?" The guy begins to leave the room and the teacher yells at him, "Hey you, boy, what's your name?" The student pulls up his pants, revealing his legs, and says, "I don't know sir. You tell me."
A college in Pennsylvania won't let overweight students graduate unless they complete a fitness course. It's a disgrace, and it makes me so proud of the college that I attended-they wouldn't let me graduate based purely on my grades!
The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
The graduate with a management degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"
Q: How many post-doctoral fellows does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: One, but it'll probably take three or four tries to get it right because he/she will probably give it to the technician to do.
Q: How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
Q: How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: It all depends on the size of the grant.
Q: How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two and a professor to take credit.
Q: How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 1/100. A graduate student needs to change 100 lightbulbs a day.
Q: Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?
A: Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen in on the guest list.
Q: Do you know how many musicians it takes more...
Q: How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 1/100. A graduate student needs to change 100 lightbulbs a day.