Finish Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    An Australian, a Frenchman and an Italian are talking about married life.Italian: When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in wine, then lick it off, and my wife, she goes wild.Frenchman: When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in chocolate, then lick it off, and my wife, she goes wild.Aussie: When I finish making love to my wife, I get out of bed and wipe my dick on the curtains, and my wife...she goes wild!

    An Australian, a Frenchman and an Italian are talking about married life. Italian: When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in wine, then lick it off, and my wife, she goes wild. Frenchman: When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in chocolate, then lick it off, and my wife, she goes wild. Aussie: When I finish making love to my wife, I get out of bed and wipe my dick on the curtains, and my wife... she goes wild!

    When I Take a long time to finish, I am slow,
    When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough

    When I don`t do it, I am lazy,
    When my boss does not do it, he is busy,

    When I do something without being told, I am trying to be smart,
    When my boss does the same, he takes the initiative,

    When I please my boss, I am apple polishing,
    When my boss pleases his boss, he is cooperating,

    When I make a mistake, I` am an idiot.
    When my boss makes a mistake, he`s only human.

    When I am out of the office, I am wondering around.
    When my boss is out of the office, he`s on business.

    When I am on a day off sick, I am always sick.
    When my boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill.

    When I apply for leave, I must be going for an interview
    When my boss applies for leave, it`s because he`s overworked

    When I do good, my boss never remembers,
    When I do wrong, he never forgets

    Two men are sitting next to each other in an Irish-style pub in New York City. They both order pints of Guinness. One of them turns to the other and says "So where are you from, then?" "I'm from Ireland." "Me too! I'll drink to that." They both finish their pints and order two more. "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin." "Me too! I'll drink to that." They both finish their pints and order two more. "Where in Dublin are you from?" "The East Side." "The East Side? Me too! What a coincidence! I'll drink to that!" They both finish their pints and order two more."Where on the East Side are you from?" "McDonagh Street." "Me too! This is incredible! I'll drink to that." As the bartender pours them another two pints, another customer at the bar says to him, "That's amazing! I can't believe they're from the same street in Dublin. What's going on?" "Oh, it's more...

    A young, virile Italian man was relaxing at a bar, when he managed to attract the attention of a spectacular young blonde woman. Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his apartment, and after some small talk, they made love.
    A few moments later, he asked with a smile, "So... you finish?"
    She paused for a moment, frowned, and replied, "No."
    Somewhat surprised, he reached for her and the lovemaking resumed. This time, she thrashed around wildly, letting out frequent screams of passion. When the lovemaking ended, the young man smiled and again asked, "You finish?"
    Once more she paused for a moment, smiled, and cuddling closer to him, said, "No."
    Now stunned, but determined that she was not going to outlast him, he reached for her again. Using his last bit of strength, they climaxed simultaneously, screaming, bucking and clawing at the bedsheets.
    Exhausted and gasping, the young man fell onto his back. more...

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