Finish Jokes / Recent Jokes

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start.
So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake.
I feel better already.

10. Usually you can find someone to do it with.
9. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place and pick up right where you left off.
8. You can finish early without feelings of guilt or shame.
7. When you open a book, you needn't worry about who else has opened it.
6. A little coffee and you can do it all night.
5. If you don't finish a chapter, you'll never gain the reputation of a 'book teaser'.
4. You can do it, eat and watch TV, all simultaneously.
3. You don't get embarrassed if your parents interrupt you in the middle.
2. You never have to put your beer down to do it.
1. If you're unsure about what you're doing, you can always ask your roommate for help.

Top 10 Reasons Studying is better than Sex
10. You can usually find someone to do it with.
9. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place and pick up where you left off.
8. You can finish early without feelings of guilt or shame.
7. When you open a book, you don't have to worry about who else has opened it.
6. A little coffee and you can do it all night.
5. If you don't finish a chapter you won't gain a reputation as a "book teaser."
4. You can do it, eat and watch T.V. all at the same time.
3. You don't get embarrassed if your parents interrupt you in the middle.
2. You don't have to put your beer down to do it.
1. If you aren't sure what you're doing, you can always ask your roommate for help.

10. You can usually find someone to do it with.
9. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place and pick up where you left off.
8. You can finish early without feelings of guilt or shame.
7. When you open a book, you don't have to worry about who else has opened it.
6. A little coffee and you can do it all night.
5. If you don't finish a chapter you won't gain a reputation as a "book teaser."
4. You can do it, eat and watch T.V. all at the same time.
3. You don't get embarrassed if your parents interrupt you in the middle.
2. You don't have to put your beer down to do it.
1. If you aren't sure what you're doing, you can always ask your roommate for help.

Please circle the letter that best describes your response.
1. When dinner is served, what do you say?
A. Is the turkey done? How are the mashed potatoes? Could I
make some more gravy?
B. I get first pick! I paid for that turkey.
C. Who needs their wine topped off?
D. I want to open presents first.
E. Please pass the salad, and no, I’m not dating anybody.
F. Why is everybody here? It’s not my birthday, is it?
G. Are you going to finish that? I’ll be glad to finish
that for you.
2. When opening gifts, what do you say?
A. I’m going to save this pretty wrapping paper.
B. I paid $57. 95 for that and he’s playing with the box!
Play with the toy!!
C. I don’t need another 12-step book.
D. This stinks! I wanted a pokeasurusmon game.
E. Oh, great. Another tablecloth. I can use this while
eating take-out every night.
F. This is a wonderful hat. I can keep my government
secrets in more...

10. You can usually find someone to do it with. 9. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place and pick up where you left off. 8. You can finish early without feelings of guilt or shame. 7. When you open a book, you don't have to worry about who else has opened it. 6. A little coffee and you can do it all night. 5. If you don't finish a chapter you won't gain a reputation as a "book teaser." 4. You can do it, eat and watch T.V. all at the same time. 3. You don't get embarrassed if your parents interrupt you in the middle. 2. You don't have to put your beer down to do it. 1. If you aren't sure what you're doing, you can always ask your roommate for help.

10. You can usually find someone to do it with.9. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place and pick up where you left off.8. You can finish early with-out feelings of guilt or shame.7. When you open a book, you don't have to worry about who else has opened it.6. A little coffee and you can do it all night.5. If you don't finish a chapter you won't gain a reputation as a "book teaser."4. You can do it, eat and watch TV all at the same time.3. You don't get embarrassed if your parents interrupt you in the middle.2. You don't have to put your beer down to do it.1. If you aren't sure what you're doing, you can always ask your roommate for help!