Election Jokes / Recent Jokes
Howard Dean's wife held a press conference today where she announced that until the election is over she will shave off all her pubic hair and sit on stage with husband Howard, and wearing no panties.Astounded reporters asked what the message was, to which she replied "Read my lips. No more Bush"
A person from Muzaffarpur narrates a story about an election campaign. A car broke down on the road. While the driver was tinkering with the engine, a rustic came along and asked if he could get a ride to his vllage which was a short distance away in the same direction.
"No," replied the car owner, "this car is only meant to take Congress voters from their villages to the polling booth. You go to your village on foot and then I may give you a lift."
The car drove away. The driver remarked to his boss, "Sir, I am sure from this man's village we will not get a single vote."
"That was the whole idea," replied the boss. "I don't want my party to win because it did not give me the ticket."
We, the people of Florida, are holding this election hostage.When you, the people of the U.S., promise to stop sending usyour old people, we will release your election.
It was local election time and the candidate was visiting all the houses in his area.
At one house a small boy answered the door. "Tell me, young man, "said the politician,
"Is your Mommy in the Republican Party or the Democratic Party?"
"Neither," said the child, "she`s in the bathroom."
Political candidates have started courting voters on Myspace, starting with Phil Angelides, who is running for governor in California.
Or it could just be a pedophile trying to trick 13-year-old girls into vote for him.
While the minority of citizens who actually voted tuesday may have turned to CNN, FOX and the regular networks for election night coverage, empty headed mall rats that night were glued to the V Channel(Vacuous Lifestyle Channel) for wall to wall coverage of the Brittany Spears Divorce. V Channel conducted their own exit polls at parking lots of suburban malls across America. By a 10-1 margin, young mall rats said the divorce filings would not effect their decision to not vote, not register to vote and remain as ignorant of current affairs as possible.
As you know, in many areas of the country this week, voters approved referendums banning Same Sex marriages. Of course, our nation is one of many sub-cultures. Different areas have different values....
For instance, this past tuesday in San Francisco, voters aproved a referendum banning Opposite Sex Marriages.