Edwards Jokes / Recent Jokes

One day an older fella was in for a checkup. After his examination, his
doctor was amazed.
"Holy cow! Mr. Edwards, I must say that you are in the greatest shape of
any 64 year old I have ever examined!"
"Did I say I was 64?"
"Well, no, did I read your chart wrong?"
"Damn straight you did! I'm 85!"
"85! Unbelievable! You would be in great shape if you were 25! How old
was your father when he died?"
"Did I say he was dead?"
"You mean..."
"Damn straight! He's 106 and going strong!"
"My Lord! What a healthy family you must come from! How long did your
grandfather live?"
"Did I say he was dead?"
"No! You can't mean..."
"Damn straight! He's 126, and getting married next week!"
"126! Truly amazing, Mr. Edwards. But gee, I wouldn't think a man would
want to get married at that more...

One day an older fella was in for a checkup.After his examination, his doctor was amazed."Holy cow! Mr. Edwards, I must say that you are in thegreatest shape of any 64 year old I have ever examined!""Did I say I was 64?""Well, no, did I read your chart wrong?""Damn straight you did! I'm 85!""85! Unbelievable! You would be in great shape if you were25! How old was your father when he died?""Did I say he was dead?""You mean...""Damn straight! He's 106 and going strong!""My Lord! What a healthy family you must come from! How long did your grandfather live?""Did I say he was dead?""No! You can't mean...""Damn straight! He's 126, and getting married next week!""126! Truly amazing, Mr. Edwards. But gee, I wouldn't thinka man would want to get married at that age!""Did I say he 'wanted' to get married?..."

It was time for Father John's Saturday night bath and young Sister Magdalene Edwards had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun had instructed. Sister Magdalene Edwards was also instructed not to look at Fr. John's nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he told her to do, and pray.
The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the Saturday night bath had done.
"Oh, sister," said the young nun dreamily."I've been saved."
"Saved? And how did that fine thing come about?" asked the old nun.
"Well, when Fr. John was soaking in the tub, he asked me to wash him, and while I was washing him he guided my hand down between his legs where he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven."
"Did he now," said the old nun evenly.
Sister Magdalene continued, "And Fr. John said that if the Key to Heaven fit my lock, the portals of Heaven would be opened to me and I would be assured of more...

One day an older fella was in for a checkup. After his examination, his doctor was amazed." Holy cow! Mr. Edwards, I must say that you are in thegreatest shape of any 64 year old I have ever examined!""Did I say I was 64?" "Well, no, did I read your chart wrong?" "Damn straight you did! I'm 85!""85!! Unbelievable! You would be in great shape if you were25! How old was your father when he died?" "Did I say he was dead?" "You mean...""Damn straight! He's 106 and going strong!""My Lord! What a healthy family you must come from! How long did your grandfather live?" "Did I say he was dead?" "No! You can't mean...""Damn straight! He's 126, and getting married next week!""126! Truly amazing, Mr. Edwards. But gee, I wouldn't thinka man would want to get married at that age!""Did I say he' wanted' to get married?..."

George W Bush, John Kerry & John Edwards are discussing their Manhood
Bush say when I want to feel like a real man, I put on my cowboy hat and boots and ride Laura all over the ranch 'for the Glory of Texas"
Edwards retorts Elizabeth likes to put on a judges robe, and I do it for the "Little Guy"
After a long silence Bush and Edwards curious about kerry prods Kerry to reveal is favorite thing. Well say Kerry, I put a Bank Bag over Teresa head and do it for the "money"

On Wednesday, former Senator John Edwards announced "Edwards in'08," his campaign to end up as Barack Obama's running mate.

Bill Clinton, John Edwards, Mark Sandford and Tiger Woods walk into a bar and there's one woman there.
Edwards says, "I'm trying to look better in the public eye - can't do it."
Sandford says, "I've got this hot latin babe. I've gotta pass."
Tiger says, "Next time Elin's using a 2 iron and aiming lower. Can't risk it."
Clinton breaks out into a broad smile and turns to his secret service agents: "Boys - make sure Hillary's still in Afghanistan."