Distraught Jokes / Recent Jokes

A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, "shut up... you're next!"

A distraught mum rushed into the back yard, where eight-year-old Tommy was banging on the bottom of an old upturned tin bath with a poker. "What do you think youre doing?" she demanded. "Im just entertaining the baby," explained Tommy. "Where is the baby?" asked his Mum. "Under the bath."

For several weeks," the distraught factory worker confided to his psychiatrist, "I was obsessed with the idea of putting my organ in the pickle slicer. The thought kept me awake nights. When I finally fell asleep, I would dream about it. I couldn't work effectively. All I could do was stare at the pickle slicer and daydream. Finally, I couldn't con-trol my passion. During lunch hour yesterday, I stayed in the factory and fulfilled my desire."
"My God!" gasped the psychiatrist. "What happened?"
"The foreman came back from lunch early," said the worker, "saw what was going on and fired me on the spot."
"What happened to the pickle slicer?"
"Of course," the worker responded, "she was fired, too."

Fearing her husband is having an affair, the distraught young blonde goes to the gun shop and buys a gun. When she comes home she finds her husband in bed with a brunette. Pulling the gun out of her purse, she points it at her own head. Seeing this, the husband jumps out of bed pleading with her to not shoot herself.
"Oh shut up," she yells at him. "You're next!"

A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having
an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she
comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs
the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging
and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde
responds to the husband, "shut up... you're next!"