Detective Jokes / Recent Jokes

A tourist asks a man in uniform, "Are you a policeman?"

"No, I am an undercover detective."

"So why are you in uniform?"

"Today is my day off."

THE CHINESE DETECTIVE
A man suspected his wife of seeing another man. So, he hired a famous Chinese detective, Ram Pam Sim Wimm, to watch and report any activities that might develop. A few days later, he received this report:
Most honorable sir:
You leave house.
He come house.
I watch..
He and she leave house.
I follow.
He and she get on train.
I follow.
He and she go in hotel.
I climb tree-look in window.
He kiss she.
She kiss he.
He strip she.
She strip he.
He play with she.
She play with he.
I play with me.
Fall out of tree, not see.
NO FEE

A man suspected his wife of seeing another man. So, he hired a famous Chinese detective, Ram Pam Sim Wimm, to watch and report any activities that might develop. A few days later, he received this report:

Most honorable sir:
You leave house.
He come house.
I watch..
He and she leave house.
I follow.
He and she get on train.
I follow.
He and she go in hotel.
I climb tree-look in window.
He kiss she.
She kiss he.
He strip she.
She strip he.
He play with she.
She play with he.
I play with me.
Fall out of tree, not see.

NO FEE

A man suspected his wife of seeing another man. So, he hired a famous Chinese detective, Mr. Sui Tansow Pok, to watch and report any activities that might develop. A few days later, he received this report: Most honorable sir: You leave house. He come house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she get on train. I follow. He and she go in hotel. I climb tree-look in window. He kiss she. She kiss he. He strip she. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he. I play with me. fall out of tree, not see.. .....NO FEE

A man suspected his wife was seeing another man, so he hired the famous Chinese detective, Chen Lee, to watch and report any activities while he was gone. A few days later, he received this report:
Most Honorable Sir:
You leave house.
I watch house.
He come to house. I watch.
He and she leave house. I follow.
He and she go in hotel. I climb tree.
I look in window.
He kiss she. She kiss he.
He strip she. She strip he.
He play with she. She play with he.
I play with me. I fall out of tree.
I not see.
No Fee.....

A man suspected his wife of seeing another man so he hired a famous Chinese detective, Ram Pam Sim Wimm, to watch and report any activities that might develop.
A few days later he received this report:
Most honorable sir:
You leave house. I watch house. He comes to house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she get on train. I follow. He and she go in hotel.
I climb tree - look in window. He kiss she. She kiss he. He strip her. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he. I play with ME. Fall out of tree, not see.
NO FEE.

Two police officers respond to a crime scene behind a grocery store. The homicide detective is already there."What happened?" asks the first officer."Male, about twenty-five, covered in Raisin Bran and dead as a doornail.""Good grief," says the second officer. "Didn't we have one covered in Frosted Flakes yesterday? And Captain Crunch last week?""You're right. I'm afraid," said the detective as he took a drag from his cigar, "this is the work of a cereal killer."