Deer Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q what do you call a deer with no eyes?
A no idea
Q what do you call adeer with no eyes and no legs?
A still no idea
Q what do you call a deer with no eyes no legs and no genitalia?
A still no fucking idea
A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the thestranger turned to the Little Johnny and said, "Let's talk. I've heardthat flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with yourfellow passenger." Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and saidto the stranger "What would you like to discuss?" "Oh, I don't know," said the stranger. "How about nuclear power?" "OK," said Little Johnny. "That could be an interesting topic. But letme ask you a question first. "A horse, a cow, and a deer all eatgrass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cowturns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Whydo you suppose that is?" "Jeez," said the stranger. "I have no idea." "Well, then," said Little Johnny, "How is it that you feel qualified todiscuss nuclear power when you don't know sh*t?"
A gorilla was walking thru' a jungle when he came across a deer eating grasses in a clearing. The gorilla roared,' Who's the king of the jungle?', and the deer replied,' Oh, you are, Master.'The gorilla walked off pleased. Soon he came across a zebra drinking at a water hole. Again, he roared,'Who's the king of the jungle?', of course, the zebra replied,' You are, master.'The gorilla walked of pleased. Then he came across an elephant.' Who's the king of the jungle?', he roared again, at the elephant. With that, the elephant threw the gorilla across a tree and jumped on him. The gorilla scraped himself up off the ground and said,' Ok, ok, there's no need to get mad just because you don't know the answer!'
What does a redneck call hitting a deer at 65 mph?
- Fast food.
Why are sheep always in a field? Because they can’t get out!
Who gives my cat his Christmas presents? Santa Paws!
Who gives my other cat his Christmas presents? Santa Claws!
What did the hat say to the scarf? You hang around while i go ahead!
Whats the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs!
What did mary say to santa during the storm? Look at that rain, dear!
Where do plumbers buy there presents? Bath!
Why is it best to park your car near the moon? Because there is a lot of space!
What is the use of reindeer? It makes the garden grow sweetie!
How many legs does rudolph have? Four? No, six. - he’s got forelegs and two back legs!
What game do six reindeer play in the back of a mini? Squash!
Why did the reindeer take his nose apart? To see what made it run!
What do you call a reindeer that has a number on its tail? Reg!
Did you hear the story of the 3 reindeer? No. Oh deer, Oh deer, Oh deer
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There was once 3 indians and a chief. the chief told the indians to go hunting a couple minutes later the first indian comes back with a deer. The chief said, "how did you get that deer?". The indian said, "Me see track me follow track me shoot deer". Then the 2nd indian comes back with a bear. the chief asked him how he got the bear. the indian said, "Me see track me follow track me shoot bear." A couple hours later the third indian comes back all bruised up and bleeding. The chief asked, "What happened to you"? The indian said me see track me follow track me get hit by a train.