Cupped Jokes

A group of Americans was touring a market in India when Mr. Beesley noticed a local man watering his elephant. Strolling over and taking the man's picture, Beesley wondered if he had time to do some exploring on his own. Having left his watch at the hotel, he said, "I wonder, sir, if you could tell me the time?"
The Indian nodded, then reached out and took the elephant's balls in his hand, shifting them slightly.
"It's five of one," he said after a moment.
"Good God!" gasped the American. "That's incredible. Wait here, I've got to tell the others."
Rushing back to the group and telling them what he'd seen, he brought them over to the owner of the elephant and once again asked for the time. And once again the Indian reached out, cupped the elephant's balls in his hand as though weighing them, then moved them to one side and declared, "It is seven minutes past one."
One of the group members checked her watch and more...

One day as a blonde was walking along the shore of a huge lake.
She spotted another blonde on the opposite shore.
She cupped her hands together and shouted "How do I get to the other side?"
The other blonde cupped her hands together and shouted "YOU ARE ON THE OTHER SIDE!"