Cruiser Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man was driving home late one afternoon above the
speed limit. He noticed a police car with its red
lights in his rearview mirror.
He thought, "I can outrun this guy," so he floored
it and the race was on. The cars were racing down
the highway at 90 miles an hour.
Finally, as his speedometer passed 100, the guy
figured, "What the heck," and gave up.
He pulled over to the curb. The police officer got
out of his cruiser and approached the car.
He leaned down and said, "Listen mister,
I`ve had a really lousy day, and I just want
to go home. Give me a good excuse and
I`ll let you go."
The man thought for a moment and said,
"Three weeks ago, my wife ran off with a police
officer.
When I saw your cruiser in my rearview mirror,
I thought you were that officer and you were trying
to give her back to me!"

A man was driving home late one afternoon, and he was driving above the speed limit. He notices a police car with its red lights on in his rear view mirror. He thinks "I can outrun this guy," so he floors it and the race is on. The cars are racing down the highway -- 60, 70, 80, 90 miles an hour.

Finally, as his speedometer passes 100, the guy figures "what the heck," and gives up. He pulls over to the curb.

The police officer gets out of his cruiser and approaches the car. He leans down and says "Listen mister, I`ve had a really lousy day, and I just want to go home. Give me a good excuse and I`ll let you go."

The man thought for a moment and said... "Three weeks ago, my wife ran off with a police officer. When I saw your cruiser in my rear view mirror, I thought that you were the officer and that you were trying to give her back to me!"

A man was driving home late one afternoon, and he was driving above the speed limit. He notices a police car with its red lights on in his rear view mirror. He thinks “I can outrun this guy, ” so he floors it and the race is on. The cars are racing down the highway - 60, 70, 80, 90 miles an hour.
Finally, as his speedometer passes 100, the guy figures “what the heck, ” and gives up. He pulls over to the curb.
The police officer gets out of his cruiser and approaches the car. He leans down and says “Listen mister, I’ve had a really lousy day, and I just want to go home. Give me a good excuse and I’ll let you go. ”
The man thought for a moment and said… “Three weeks ago, my wife ran off with a police officer. When I saw your cruiser in my rear view mirror, I thought that you were the officer and that you were trying to give her back to me! ”

Then there was the sleek new cruiser that the navy nicknamed "Nympho" because there was no problem getting her out of her slip or filling her with seamen.

Driving home one day, a speeder was going about 20 over the speed limit. Not long before a police car was flashing red lights behind him. He had a few drinks, so figured he would just outrun him by flooring the gas pedal. He hit 70, then 80, 90, 100 miles an hour. When the speedometer passed 110 and he still hadn`t shaken the cop off, the man decided to give up and pull over. The police officer got out of the cruiser and approached the car. Leaning down, he said, "Listen mister, I`ve had a really lousy day and I just want to get home. Give me a good enough excuse and I`ll let you go."
Thinking quickly, the man said, "Officer, two weeks ago my wife ran off with a police officer. When I saw your cruiser following me, I thought you were that cop and that you were trying to catch up with me to give her back!"