"Speeder" joke
Driving home one day, a speeder was going about 20 over the speed limit. Not long before a police car was flashing red lights behind him. He had a few drinks, so figured he would just outrun him by flooring the gas pedal. He hit 70, then 80, 90, 100 miles an hour. When the speedometer passed 110 and he still hadn`t shaken the cop off, the man decided to give up and pull over. The police officer got out of the cruiser and approached the car. Leaning down, he said, "Listen mister, I`ve had a really lousy day and I just want to get home. Give me a good enough excuse and I`ll let you go."
Thinking quickly, the man said, "Officer, two weeks ago my wife ran off with a police officer. When I saw your cruiser following me, I thought you were that cop and that you were trying to catch up with me to give her back!"
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