"Maori falla on island" joke
Maori falla was flying home to NZ from OZ when the plane crashed on a deserted island and he was the only survivor. Walking along the beach he tripped on something. POOF!!! a cloud of smoke and a Genie appeared.
Maori falla "Who the hell are you!!?"
"Im the Genie of the lamp and you knocked the lid off when you tripped over it , setting me free."
Maori falla "So"
" So i must grant you one wish according to custom before i can return home"
Maori falla " Home! ...Yea no what you mean mate was heading home to a big party myself till this bloody crash, was looking forward to the Hangi.. havent had one for donk's .......wish i had some now
A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...
One day Rastus and Liza Jane were sitting at the bus stop when Rastus ups and asks, "Liza Jane can I's look up your dress before the bus gets here?"Liza Jane was startled and said, "No Rastus you cain't!"Well Rastus persisted and persisted till finally Liza more...
An angel wrote:
Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.
To handle yourself, use your head; To handle others, use your heart.
Anger is only one letter short of danger.
If someone betrays you once, more...
Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...