"fingered" joke

I once fingered my daughter to the police.

I think it was every breath you take.

your mamma is so ugly she makes blind kids scared

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Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

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A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...

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A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...

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Knock Knock
Who's there!
Lois!
Lois who?
Lois the man on the totem pole!

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James H. H. Lampert:The biggest flaw in the common form of this joke is that the punchline makes no sense if "big sister" is the one who'd said that she wants to "put it in cider." Much better, something like "Everybody says that when big sister gets a prick . . . " or "Big Brother says that whenever Big Sister gets a prick . . . "
Funny Joke? 101 vote(s). 46% are positive. 1 comment(s).