"Why did the Koala" joke
Why did the first Koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.
Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree?
It was stapled to the first.
Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree?
It thought suicide was in.
Why did the fourth Koala fall out of the tree?
It had a grand piano tied to it's foot.
Why did the fifth Koala fall out of the tree?
It was hit by the piano stool.
Why did the Kangaroo drop dead?
It was hit by 5 Koalas and a grand piano.
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...
A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...
A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."
A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...
I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and more...