"Stranded On An Island" joke
A man was stranded on a desert island for twelve years. One day, as he was sitting on the beach, a beautiful woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear suddenly emerged from the water.
She approached him and asked, "Would you like a cigarrette?"
"Oh, yes!" replied the surprised man. "It's been twelve long years since I've had a smoke."
She unzipped a pocket in her wet suit, pulled out a pack of cigarrettes and gave him one. After lighting it, he took a long drag and said, "Boy, that sure is good."
"Would you care for a drink?" she asked.
"You bet! It's been twelve long years since I've had a drink," he replied.
She then unzipped another pocket, pulled out a flask of scotch and gave it to him. After taking a few long gulps, he said, "Man, that is sweet!"
"Now," she asked seductively, "would you like to play around?"
"Hallelujah!" he exclaimed, tears forming in his eyes. "You mean you have golf clubs in there too?!?"
Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 lbs.
Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes
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