"Redneck Olympics" joke
10. Doves released during opening ceremonies are promptly shot by the crowd and sold as concession snacks.
9. In an amazing coincidence, every proposed Olympic venue turns out to be owned by the Governor.
8. The big event is the 100m Sisterchase.
7. Instead of shooting at boring targets, archers take aim at muskrats and ATF agents.
6. Urine drug test transformed into "Distance Pissin Competition."
5. Olympic Village replaced with Olympic Trailer Park.
4. Awards of gold, silver and bronze medals replaced by award of gold, silver, and bronze teeth.
3. Opening Ceremony is a Skynyrd tape and a trunk full of bottle rockets.
2. Hometown favorites falter in gymnastics competitions due to all them extra toes.
1. Two words: Billy Bobsledding.
An old married couple were driving down the road one day when suddenly the woman punched her husband right in the face. He shouted, "what the hell was that for?". She replied, "That was for 50 years of the worst sex I ever had!" As they continued down the more...
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Q:what did god say when the first black person came to heaven?
A:oops I must of burnt one!!