"Marriage !!!!!!!!" joke

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.
You order what you want, and then when you see
what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come

Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered

Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

Q: Why dogs don't marry?
A: Because they are already leading a dog's life

Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?
A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offence!