"Johnny strikes again !" joke
The teacher comes into the classroom to find 'SHIT' written on the blackboard. The teacher gets very furious on reading it. However, the experience got the better of her and she tries to address the problem in a cool fashion.
She goes, "We are going to take care of this on the honour system. We are all going to shut our eyes while I count up to hundred, and when we open the eyes, I want that to be erased."
They all close their eyes and she counts. Piter-patter. "One hundred!"
They open their eyes and look. On the floor below the blackboard is a fresh pile of shit, and chalked above it is "The Phantom strikes again!".
An old married couple were driving down the road one day when suddenly the woman punched her husband right in the face. He shouted, "what the hell was that for?". She replied, "That was for 50 years of the worst sex I ever had!" As they continued down the more...
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Q:what did god say when the first black person came to heaven?
A:oops I must of burnt one!!