"I want to die peacefully in my sleep" joke

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...

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A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...

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Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

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If you're easily offended (I mean VERY easily), don't read this.
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WOMEN SPEAK IN ESTROGEN AND MEN LISTEN IN TESTOSTERONE... By Matt Groening (Creator of The Simpsons and Life in Hell)
Deep Thoughts about Gender Differences
SEX: Women prefer 30-40 minutes of more...

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A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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crazy_driver_78:I like making passengers scream from my driving on purpose without falling asleep at the wheel. how do you think I got my handle.
Funny Joke? 24 vote(s). 67% are positive. 2 comment(s).