"Great Sport" joke
Bruce is driving over Harbor Bridge one day listening to some music in his car and just having a really great day. Suddenly he looks over through the streams of traffic and he sees his girlfriend Sheila standing on the side of the bridge looking down.
It's pretty apparent that she's just about to throw herself off the bridge into the water far below. Bruce slammed on the brakes and his car screeches to a halt. he bolts out of the car and shouts, "Sheila! What the hell do you think you're doin babe'?"
Sheila turned around with tears welling up in her eyes and says, "Bruce, honey! You got me pregnant and and I don't want to be a burden so now I'm just gonna kill myself!"
Bruce got a lump in his throat and climbs back into his car when he heard this and says to her, "Sheila, not only are you a great screw, but you're a good sport about it too!"
John Blanchard stood up from the bench, straightened his Army uniform, and studied the crowd of people making their way through Grand Central Station. He looked for the girl whose heart he knew, but whose face he didn't, the girl with the rose. His interest in her had begun more...
Golf Genie
A husband and wife, out enjoying a round of golf, were about to tee off on
the third hole, which was lined with beautiful homes. The wife hit her
shot and the ball began to slice - her shot was headed directly at a very
large plate glass window. Much more...
1. Stick your palm open under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"2. Say "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that." 3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.4. Say, more...
On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, a frontal lobotomy.
On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me, two cases of Prozac.
On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me, three stays at the
"hospital".
On the more...