"Gordon Ramsay" joke

Bruce comes home from the pub and sees Sheila watching Gordon Ramsay's F%*#ing cooking show on the telly.
Bruce says; "What are you watching that shit for? You can't cook to save your life!."
To which Sheila replies; "So what? You watch porn movies, don’t you?"

A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...

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Ya mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.

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You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!

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Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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Your momma is so fat when she fell in the grand canyon she got stuck half way down.

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Funny Joke? 22 vote(s). 64% are positive. 0 comment(s).