"Elephant Joke" joke

Q: What do you call an elephant wearing pink earmuffs and a dress?
A: Anything you want, it can't hear you.
Q: Why is an elephant big, grey, and wrinkly?
A: Because, if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Aspirin.
Q: What's grey and white on the inside and red on the outside?
A: An inside out elephant.
Q: What is grey and not there.
A: No elephants.
Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant?
A: With a blue elephant gun, of course.
Q: How do you shoot a red elephant?
A: No, not with a red elephant gun. You strangle him until he turns blue, and then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a green elephant?
A: Tell him a dirty joke so he turns red, strangle him until he turns blue, and then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant?
A: Ever seen a yellow elephant? (Stup-pid, fuul, idyut!)
Q: Why are elephants wrinkled?
A: Have you ever tried to iron one?
Q: Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?
A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It was glued to the first one.
Q: Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It thought it was a game.
Q: And why did the tree fall down?
A: It thought it was an elephant.
Q: How many legs does an elephant have?
A: Four, two in the front, two in the back.
Q: How do you get an elephant into a Volkswagen Beetle?
A: Open the car door, put the elephant inside, and close the door.
Q: How do you put an elephant into a fridge?
A: Open the Beetle door, take the elephant out, close the Beetle door, open the fridge, put the elephant inside, close the fridge.
Q: How do you get 4 elephants into a Volkswagen Beetle?
A: 2 in the front and 2 in the back
Q: How do you know if there is an elephant in your fridge?
A: Footprints in the butter.
Q: How do you know if there are 2 elephants in your fridge?
A: Two sets of footprints in the butter.
Q: How do you know if there are 3 elephants in your fridge?
A: Can't get the fridge door closed.
Q: How do you know if there are 4 elephants in your fridge?
A: There's a Volkswagen Beetle parked outside it.
Q: How do you get 8 elephants in a fridge?
A: Put four in a Volkswagen Beetle, four in another Beetle, put the two Beetles in the fridge.
Q: How do you get Tarzan in the fridge?
A: Open door, get two Beetles out, put Tarzan in, close door.
Q: How do you get two Tarzans in the fridge?
A: You can't, silly. There is only one Tarzan!
Q: Why are there so many elephants running around free in the jungle?
A: The fridge isn't not large enough to hold them all.
Q: How many elephants can you actually put in a fridge?
A: Depends on the number of elephants.
Q: The Lion gathered all the animals for a meeting, all of them showed up except the elephants. Why?
A: They were stuck in the Volkswagen Beetle.
Q: How many giraffes can you fit in a Volkswagen Beetle?
A: None, the elephants are in there!
Q: How many elephants does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Don't be stupid, elephants can't change light bulbs.
Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw 1,000 elephants coming over the hill?
A: "Look, there're 1,000 elephants coming over the hill."
Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw 1,000 elephants with Sunglasses on, coming over the hill?
A: Nothing, he didn't recognize them.
Q: Why do elephants paint the soles of their feet yellow?
A: So that they can hide upside-down in bowls of custard.
Q: Did you ever find an elephant in your custard?
A: No? Well, it must work.
Q: What do you know when you see three elephants walking down the street wearing pink sweatshirts?
A: They're all on the same team.
Q: What is more difficult than getting an elephant into the back seat of your car?
A: Getting two elephants into the back seat of your car!
Q: What did the peanut say to the elephant?
A: Nothing, pea

A kindergarten teacher was giving her students a homework assignment. She said, "Students, I know you can do this. If you are going anywhere tonight, then watch how your parents drive in relation to the stoplight. This means, watch how they drive and what they say when the more...

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