"Drawing disability" joke

The bartender was washing his glasses, and an elderly Irishman came in and with great difficulty, hoisted his bad leg over the barstool, pulled himself up painfully, asked for a sip of Irish whiskey. The Irishman looked down the bar and said, Is that Jesus down there? The bartender nodded and the Irishman told him to give Jesus an Irish whiskey also. The next patron was an ailing Italian with a hunched back and slowness of movement. He shuffled up to the barstool and asked for a glass of Chianti. He also looked down the bar and asked if that was Jesus sitting down there. The bartender nodded and the Italian said to give Him a glass of Chianti also. The third patron, a redneck, swaggered in dragging his knuckles on the floor and hollered. Barkeep, set me up a cold one. Hey, is that God’s Boy down there? The barkeep nodded, and the redneck told him to give Jesus a cold one too. As Jesus got up to leave, he walked over to the Irishman and touched him and said, For your kindness, you are healed! The Irishman felt the strength come back to his leg, and he got up and danced a jig to the door. Jesus touched the Italian and said, For your kindness you are healed! The Italian felt his back straighten and he raised his hands above his head and did a flip out the door. As Jesus walked toward the redneck, the redneck jumped back and exclaimed, Don’t touch me, I’m drawin’ disability!

The Englishman's, Irishman's and Scotsman's wives go shopping one day to a big department store. While they are there a fire breaks out. Everyone in the store is killed, including the three women.
Their husbands are summoned to the local police station where a policewoman more...

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A lady walked into a bar and there were no seats available, except for one at a table that was occupied by a man, and she decides to take it. He said, "Hello, my name is Jim Snow, what's yours?"
The women replied, "June."
She went to get a drink and more...

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I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and more...

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OPERATIONAL EXCELLENCE?
Once upon a time, an American company and a Japanese company decided to have competitive boat race on the Bear River. Both teams practiced hard and long to reach their peak performance. On the big day, they both felt as ready as they could be.
The more...

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Now that Catherine Zeta-Jones-Douglas has become
firmly established in Hollywood, and Charlotte
Church is a well-known celebrity slapper in the UK,
the Welsh film industry is to receive additional
funding to step up production. They are going to
remake many more...

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