"Delivering A Calf" joke
A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 5-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, taking in the whole event.
The man thought, "Oh, this is just great... he's only 5 and I'm going to have to start explaining all about the birds and the bees. I won't jump the gun though... I'll just let him ask, and I'll answer."
After everything was over, the man walked over to his young son and said, "Well, son, do you have any questions?"
"Just one, Daddy," gasped the still wide-eyed young boy. "How fast was that calf going when he hit that cow?"
How many letters are in the alphabet?
There are 11 letters in "THE ALPHABET"
Did you say 26? :)
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
Q: What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
A: You can un-screw a lightbulb!
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.