"Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding...." joke

Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...

Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris pees in a can and sells it as redbull.