"Abortion" joke

My girlfriend had an abortion yesterday.
It went ok but it took a lot out of her.

A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...

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A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and more...

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Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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G F:Kevin courtney was the only one who avoided his mom's hanger
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Funny Joke? 90 vote(s). 39% are positive. 2 comment(s).